Monday, April 22, 2013

as if that would stop me from cashing a check...


I normally keep pretty quiet about what I do for a steady paycheck (because we all know how much money comes from being a 'writer')... Those of you who know my origins. are privy to my past exploits and what I'm ultimately at the helm of will not be surprised at all to see the above check (blurred out for privacy)... For the rest of you, no, I'm not in the adult entertainment industry. I'm in the horribly offensive joke / sticker / poster / t-shirt industry. My ties to the adult entertainment industry are modest and for shits and giggles at best.

Take note at the 'Memo'. It's no doubt that this is an attempt to keep me from cashing this royalty check. Little do they know I could care less. In fact, looking down at my chest, I see I'm currently wearing a classic black t-shirt with "FISTING... It's all fun and games until someone loses a watch" silkscreened on the front. They know not who they're dealing with.

By the way, my parents are extremely proud.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Sometimes you come across something so disturbing you MUST share...

per the Huffington Post:

Eel Removed From Man After Getting Stuck, Chewing Through Colon (GRAPHIC PHOTOS)

Do not try this at home. Do not try this anywhere. Just do not try it.

A man in China's southeastern Guangdong province admitted himself to a local hospital after he reportedly got a live eel stuck inside him. According to British tabloid The Sun, the man inserted the 20-inch-long Asian swamp eel into his anus after seeing it done in a porn movie, and he had to endure all-night surgery to have it extracted.

According to a HuffPost translation of Chinese news aggregation website Mop.com, the eel reportedly chewed through the man's colon, perforating his large intestine, and became stuck in his body cavity. A graphic X-ray image (seen below) shows how far inside the eel was when the man came in for treatment.

Medical team members reportedly said the eel, which was “simply trying to find its way out," was alive when removed but died shortly thereafter. According to The Sun, the man is still recovering at the hospital and might face animal cruelty charges.

The Asian swamp eel -- also known as the rice eel or rice paddy eel -- is a snake-shaped fish that is commonly sold live at food markets in East Asian countries.

Although this type of eel is known as an invasive species in parts of the United States, this isn't the first time that it's made its way into (ahem) foreign habitats.

In 2012, a New Zealand man had to have an eel removed from his posterior. In 2010, a Chinese man died after his friends allegedly inserted an eel into his rectum as a joke.

WARNING: GRAPHIC IMAGES
An X-ray image shows how far inside the man's body the eel was able to get.
This photo, provided by Europics, shows the eel after it was removed from the man.

Blog Tour and other random droppings...

I'm considering it. Why? Why not?

It'll give me something to do while I wait for the dust to settle over the last book signing debacle... how was I supposed to know his hair was attached? Mob mentality can be lethal and cucumbers can leave permanent scars if thrown hard enough.

Mark Tufo's 'Zombie Fallout' series still has me enthralled.

Need to find the time to venture forth for 'EVIL DEAD' regardless of what my gut tells me.